Let's face it, the last few weeks have been draining on us Florida fans. But you know what was more draining? Having to celebrate national championships every couple of months, so instead of crying in our giant stadium cups full of bourbon and bourbon (I like to put little bourbon ice cubes in there too, keeps things colder than Notre Dame's bowl history over the last few years), let's take a look at a few of this week's games.
Thurs. Nov. 2: Va Tech at Ga Tech
Now here's what I want to watch: a team that apparently really is America's Team (comes in hard and strong, can't finish the job) against a bunch of engineers who can't figure out how to make X equal anything other than .5833333333. This is really the kind of game that used to characterize the Thursday night games until the Big East decided to start playing with the big boys- two teams that you'd never watch with a full slate of games, but what the hell, it's better than watching the NBA. Or MLB. Or hock...what am I saying, hockey's been on strike for the last 3 years. What? They're back on? Oh, they'll show me all the good fights online the next day? And I don't have to watch the games? Perfect.
Sat. Nov. 4: Wisconsin at Ohio State
I shit you not, this is how hard ESPN is trying to justify OSU at the top right now: "It's back-to-back ranked teams for No.1 Ohio State as it hosts No. 21 Wisconsin." You have got to be fucking kidding me. The first game was against a 25th ranked Penn State, in a year when nobody wants to be in the Top 10 or the Top 25 anyways. And now you're going to bring Wisconsin at me? The only good thing to come out of Wisconsin is the SugarBear (half Jack, half butterscotch schnappes- the ladies love it), and it's damn sure that this team isn't any good. 5 out of Florida's last 6 were against ranked teams, including the last 4 in a row. Fuck off, ESPN.
Sat. Nov. 4: Troy at Georgia
Classic possibility for a letdown game, but I don't see it happening. Let me take a minute here to state on the record my feelings on the Richt incident so that I can then drop it from here on out. As a fan, I don't have a problem with it, it's one of the ballsiest moves I've seen from a coach in a long time. As a Florida fan, I don't have a problem with it, since it fired up the UF sideline as well- I just wish he had done it again in the 3rd quarter. So here's a big tip o the hat and Fuck You to Coach Richt- I hope next year we send someone over to your sideline to powerbomb you (perhaps the Caiman?).
Sat. Nov. 4: ASU at Oregon
I'll take the school with the pornstar cheerleaders. But wait, she got kicked off the squad, so I'm pretty sure that means that now God is pissed off at them (because if anybody loves DVDA, it's the Lord). So on second thought, going to have to give Oregon the nod here, and hope that Erickson brings a bottle of scotch to the postgame press conference.
Scotch scotch scotch, I love scotch. Wait, am I Dennis Erickson? Trippy.